temptation, thy name is cake. and coffee. and ice cream...

Asher's birthday cake

My two weeks of diet hell are halfway done.

I haven't said much about it on the intertubes -- a couple of stray comments on Facebook, and nothing on this blog. No time like the present, I guess.

It's no secret that I like foods that are...less than healthful. And I weigh more than I should. For a couple months I've been seeing a personal trainer to make sure I exercise, but that doesn't really address my eating.

But a few weeks ago she suggested a two-week "cleanse" diet. Sort of a reset. I was skeptical, though I will admit that it made sense to at least try. I gave a noncomital answer -- she can give me the details of the diet, but I make no promises about whether I'll do it. Last week I made the mistake of talking to her about it near the end of our session. Without going into the details, the essence is no highly processed foods, no dairy, sugar or wheat.

I was giving my usual "maybe I'll try it at some point" response, But Blair joined the conversation and encouraged me to try it. So by the time the trainer left, I was on a restrictive diet for two weeks.

My sushi. I should have taken the picture before I ate some of the
salmon and yellowtail

In some ways, it's not as bad as I was fearing. I'm not starving, and I do like eggs. Ethan has been making a lot of chicken for me -- marinaded in olive oil and cayenne pepper. And the trainer has been happy to answer texts when I have questions. Actually, she's been very tolerant when I send her stupid emails. At the supermarket, we saw a package of "superfruit" flavored jelly beans. I texted to ask if it was OK -- beans and fruit are both allowable, so why not this?

But the temptations are the hardest part. Ethan and I have our film class on Thursdays. Last week, Keith (who runs the class) put a big bowl of pretzels out. They were right next to me. I love pretzels -- left to my own devices, I could have eaten the whole bowl. But I managed not to take any. And last Saturday, when we were at an event for veterans, there was a huge hero sandwich that looked really good. And, of course, any work function. 

The biggest temptation was on Sunday, because it was Asher's birthday. That meant dinner out and a cake. We ended up with a Japanese restaurant, since I could have sushi and sashimi.** But there's no way around the cake. A beautiful chocolate mousse cake. And I stood and sang "Happy Birthday" with the family and watched as pieces were cut for everyone but me.

And what will I do when it's over? Honestly, I don't know. Part of me is thinking that if I got this far I can keep going. But, of course, part of what got me this far is the knowledge that it will end. It's easier to not have sandwiches when I know that I'll be able to have them again soon. The idea isn't to stay this restrictive forever. If I can control myself, I'll be eating a bit better after these two weeks are over than I was before.

But, God, do I miss pastrami.

*With the exception of the sugar that naturally occurs in fruits and vegetables

**In case you're interested, we ended up at Ginza in Massapequa. It was very good. Very fresh, which is of the utmost importance when you're talking about raw fish. Ethan, in particular, was wary. Among us he's the most finicky about food quality, but he really liked it. I can't recommend this place highly enough.