vending machine follies

There's a Coca Cola vending machine at my office. The other day it was, apparently, not working.

That's nothing new. That machine is known to behave in odd ways. There was a stretch, a few years ago, when it would give extra bottles. That was at a time when I was drinking soda. I would put in my money, selected the Coca-Cola* button, and out would come anywhere from one to eight bottles. There were other times where nothing would come out, or the wrong kind of soda would come out.

At this point, being that I'm trying to lose weight and all, I'm not buying from the soda machine. But I noticed it wasn't working because of the sticky notes that started collecting on it. First it was one note. "Didn't vend Coke <name and extension>" Then, later in the day, a similar note appeared. Then there was a third note and a pad of blank sticky notes was sitting on the counter next to the machine.

I couldn't resist. "Machine kicked me in the shin and told me I'm too fat."

*Because, seriously, what other soda is there to drink?**
**Unless you're eating pastrami, in which case there's also Cel-Ray