the medal and the spoon

Around thirty years ago, I created an alter-ego and named him Joey Thumpe. Actually, Joseph Efrem Thumpe, but that's another matter. Using the Thumpe name I wrote to a variety of celebrities, politicians and captains of industry. This is the story of one such exchange.

I saw an ad (or a PSA?) in Sports Illustrated. It showed a picture of Colin Powell, who was then the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and a message about opportunities in the military. This got Joey Thumpe to write to the General.

Of course, I didn't expect General Powell to send me one of his medals. He was gracious though, sending a nice response and an autographed photo.

I wrote back with a different request:

At this point, the General bowed out of the conversation, and left his staff to take care of it.

And it probably would have ended there if only Captain Sheffield had enclosed the spoon...

Well, I wasn't gonna get a medal, but they made dang sure they didn't leave my spoon out of a second envelope.

And, in case you're interested, this is the spoon:

a cat by any other name

and that's why we called him "Red"

One of my Facebook friends posted something about the different types of cat-namers out there. In the comments, we got into a discussion of our cat names. And I promised this blogpost. Here are the names of the cats that I (and my family) have had in my adult life, along with the stories behind their names. Since this post is just about the names, I'm leaving out all backstory (except what is necessary as background on the name. This is in chronological order, so the order should not be interpreted to indicate the cats' relative length of stay with me/us.

• Bungee: When I first brought this cat home, I started playing with her. The way she went after a string toy, she looked like she was bungee-jumping.
• Speck: One of his distinguishing features was his pink nose with a black speck on it.
• Lena: Ethan picked out the name Lena. I have no idea why.
• Hrothgar: Ethan was studying Beowulf when we got this cat, and I really liked the names of the characters.
• Tiger: This one looked like a miniature tiger.
• Morgan: We got Morgan used, so I have no idea how he got his name.
• Red: He had a beautiful red coat so we started calling him "Red." We never got around to giving him any other name.
• Cream: He had a beautiful creamy coat so we started calling him "Cream." We never got around to giving him any other name.
• Snowflake: She was white, so...
• Spiderman: This was Asher's first cat. He was into Spiderman and had picked out the name before the cat was even born.
• 18: Asher was understandably upset after Spiderman died as a kitten (while we were in Florida). As a way of consoling him on the thousand-plus mile drive home, we talked about him getting another cat. When we asked what he would name it, he suggested "Please Don't Die, Baby." That seemed a bit awkward. 18 is a lucky number in Judaism as it symbolizes life*, so I suggested that it would be a good substitute. I'm very glad that Asher went for it.
  
• Wiglaf: This name was another name from to Beowulf.
• Copper: He had a beautiful copper coat.

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*This has to do with Hebrew numerology. Each letter in the Hebrew alphabet has an associated number, and a word or name is often associated with the sum of the values of its letters. The Hebrew word, חי, which means life, is thus associated with the number 18.

cinema history class: d'wild wild weng

Session: Spaghetti (with Different Sauces) Westerns, Week 3
Movie: D'Wild Wild Weng (1982)
Directed by Eddie Nicart 

As always, there may be spoilers here. And the trailer may be NSFW and/or NSFL.

Plot:
A diminutive hero and his sidekick team up with a mute, a gang of ninjas and a tribe of Amerindian midgets to defeat a town bully. Hilarity ensues.

Reaction:

After seeing For Y'ur Height Only last summer, I was kind of expecting this to be similarly small in scope -- keeping in mind that this would be a western (as opposed to Height, which was based on the James Bond-type spy movies). I was very wrong.

D'WWW is very ambitious in its scope, leading me to believe that the producers were trying to make some sort of epic. There's an unexpected hugeness of scope here, and the final product does show a wide array of influences. A lot of the outdoors looks like the set of 1966's Django, and the climactic scene reminded me of Mad Max. And in one scene we're treated to Weng Weng jumping from a cliff, complete with the iconic Six Million Dollar Man sound effects. Along with the disparate influences, the producers seemed to throw everything they could in there -- ninjas, a samurai, a tribe of Amerindian midgets. And we mustn't forget Lupo. Lupo is a mute -- his tongue had been cut out. And he spends most of his time onscreen gesticulating wildly while vocalizing wordless shrieks and squeals.

And the resulting product is really an unfathomable mess. There's really no effort to be coherent. The characters seemed to be costumed in whatever street clothes they showed up in. You have a Civil War-era gatling gun mounted to a dune buggy, and an odd feeling that no one know what the fuck is going on, or when this thing is supposed to take place.

Still, it was good for a few laughs.

Ratings:

Me: 5

Christina: 7.6

Ethan: 3

Sean: 4 out of 4

happy zmedsday!! (ci)

 

random childhood memories: the ukulele

When I was a kid my father's uncle bought me a ukulele. I don't know why.

One afternoon, when my cousins were visiting (they lived in Indiana), I was playing in the backyard* and my cousin came walking down the driveway** with my ukulele. He was kind of strumming it and singing. For some reason I got angry that he was playing my ukulele. It shouldn't have bothered me since my parents brought my sister and me up to share toys. But it did bother me. I ran to my cousin, screaming at him, and tried to grab the uke from his hands.

In the ensuing struggle, the ukulele broke. I was furious and blamed him; if he hadn't taken it, it wouldn't have broken. And if he had let it go when I tried to grab it from him, it wouldn't have broken. No one else saw it from my perspective. Everyone else tried to tell me that he had done nothing wrong. And if I hadn't tried to grab the instrument from him it wouldn't have broken. The way everyone saw it, it was my fault.

And everyone else was right. I'm sorry, Stephen.

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*Actually, Mrs. Consoli's backyard. Mrs. Consoli lived next door to us. There was no fence or hedgerow between yards, so Mrs. Consoli let us play in hers as if the two yards were one big one.
**Actually, Mrs. Consoli's driveway.

cinema history class: the treasure of silver lake

Session: Spaghetti (with Different Sauces) Westerns, Week 2
Movie: The Treasure of Silver Lake (1962)
Directed by Harald Reinl 

As always, there may be spoilers here. And the trailer may be NSFW and/or NSFL.

Plot:
After a man is murdered for a map to treasure, his son races the bad guys to get that treasure. Hilarity ensues.

Reaction:

I have often said that what distinguishes a spaghetti western is that, instead of good guys and bad guys, there are bad guys and worse guys. With that in mind, The Treasure of Silver Lake is no spaghetti western. The heroes, Winnetou and Shatterhand*, are unambiguously good guys. Also absent are the sadism and sheer ugliness that overwhelm many spaghetti westerns.

I say that because I went into this expecting a spaghetti western. Instead we got a European-made western that was very much in the tradition of the old American Westerns. There were good guys and bad guys and cowboys and Indians and shootings, and beautiful vistas. Keith said that this palyed out like a John Ford movie. He's probably right, but I am not particularly familiar with John Ford movies. From my perspective, this was like a Louis L'amour novel come to life.

I went through a phase -- maybe ten years ago -- when I was reading lots of Louis L'amour. The good guys were good. The bad guys were bad. There was action and suspense, but L'amour had a basic contract with the reader. Everything would work out in the end, and goodness would prevail. And there was a certain comfort in that. And that's the way it is with Treasure. I kind of know, in macro terms, how the movie would end, even though I didn't know the specifics. And it was a fun ride watching it get there. 

This may not be the best of movies or even the best of Westerns, but it's certainly an enjoyable view.

Ratings:

Me: 8.5

Christina: 8.2

Ethan: 8

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*After watching this, I want to legally change my name to Winnetou Shatterhand. Would that be a bad career move?

goodbye blue bay, hello landmark

Since the autumn of 2019*, Sharon and I have been having breakfast together every Saturday. I wrote about the start of that tradition here. We tried a variety of ways to have our breakfasts, but eventually found ourselves with a regular routine -- the nearby Blue Bay Diner. More exactly, because of COVID, the tent outside of the Blue Bay Diner. For months that's been our regular.

The biggest problem has been the cold. They have heaters in the tent, but on particularly cold days it gets uncomfortable. So last Saturday, with threatened lows, we decided to go into Nassau County (where indoor dining is allowed) and the Landmark Diner. I'm not sure why I picked the Landmark, except that I have vague memories of being there before, and I have no negative associations with it. So off we went, figuring that this was a temporary change of routine -- that when there was warmer weather again, we'd be back at the Blue Bay.

But it doesn't look like that's how it'll be. We agreed that the food was better. And as we ate our meal, we both kind of came to the realization that we want to go back. Sharon particularly noted that there are a bunch of menu items she'd like to try. I'd be happy to keep getting the burger week after week, but we'll see. While we're at it, I noticed that the prices were slightly better. I guess I also liked being able to eat indoors, but that's something that's really out of Blue Bay's control.

It's Friday night as I write this, and Sharon and I are planning to go back to Landmark tomorrow morning. And I feel kind of sad about it. I've actually been feeling sad about it all week. I know I shouldn't. If one business provides a better product, I go to that business. So I've been trying to figure out why this change bothers me.

But I think Blair got it. The Blue Bay isn't just another restaurant to me. It's practically a landmark (hah! I just noticed what I did there!). And it has a special place in my memory. When I was a kid, my maternal grandparents lived in the Pittsburgh area. They'd visit us once or twice a year. And one highlight of each visit was a dinner at the Blue Bay Diner. Young me thought the Blue Bay was a fancy restaurant. By abandoning it for the Landmark, I may be turning my back on a piece of my childhood.

And that makes me sad. But the burgers at the Landmark...

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*Originally I typed 1989. I don't know why.

cinema history class: a town called hell

Session: Spaghetti (with Different Sauces) Westerns, Week 1
Movie: A Town Called Hell (1971)
Directed by Robert Parrish 

As always, there may be spoilers here. And the trailer may be NSFW and/or NSFL.

Plot:
Ten years after her husband was murdered, a widow returns to a godforsaken town to find the killers. Hilarity ensues.

Reaction:

It's unclear to me whether this is technically a spaghetti western, since it wasn't made with Italian money -- it was an international (mostly European) coproduction, though, and it does feel like a spaghetti western so I'll go with that.

That said, the fact is not all spaghetti westerns are good. Case in point. The premise is reasonably compelling, and in fact seems like the perfect idea for a spaghetti western. But the storytelling is muddled, which makes it hard to follow.

The exceptional cast (Stella Stevens, Robert Shaw, Telly Savalas, Martin Landau) turn in a good effort. Especially Telly Savalas, who spends a lot of time shirtless -- in a William Shatner sort of way. But Landau is not exactly believable as a Mexican.

I wanted to like this one more than I did.

Ratings:

Me: 6.5

Christina: 7.2

Ethan: 7

Sean 2 out of 4